The merry month of June
There is so much going on around here that I haven't been able to stop and properly think about things that used to thrill me. And it is not that they have lost their charm. In exactly two months, I am going to have a break from work. I will take a plane. I will land on my happiest place. I will meet some of my dearest friends. Two months used to seem such a short time. But these days, it includes the whole construction, the moving operation, and all the details that must be decided beforehand. During those 60 days, I am supposed to start our yearly food special, and go through the first set of school exams of my kids. With Luiz redoing seventh grade, this will be particularly tense, though I trust his improved tolerance for sitting down and studying.
So today I decided to spend five minutes just daydreaming about something good, and renew my enthusiasm about it. Why do I want so much to go to my happy corner of the world, a place I have been so many times before? First, I come for safety. In my special place, I usually feel safe from harm most of the times, physical harm and emotional harm too. I cross the continent bc I feel safe enough to relax and be myself, without having to abide to anyone else's rules. My rules are simple: I want to laugh, be silly, have fun, and by being myself, contribute to the fun of a bunch of special people. The people I love and that I am going to meet again mostly accept me, my weirdnesses, my Latin American cheerfulness and this inability we have here to talk without touching. Okay, I try to control my hands when I am in the US, but many times, I have to say that they have a life of their own. I try to retribute my friends' acceptance, by trying to accept them also the way they are the best way I can.
In real life, I often get to walk on eggshells, try to be a diplomat, get to cross a mined field, have to skip some barriers, pretend to be invisible, gotta surf the tsunami and swim on high waters. What the heck, isn't that what everybody does everyday? It is not such a big deal, really. But on my happiest place, I am decided that Livia will be always as Livia-ish as only Livia can be.
1 Comments:
What is it about that place that makes all our problems melt away? Is there magic pixie dust falling down from those welcoming and all too familiar gates? I don't know what it is, but I'm very glad it happens-for you and for me.
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