Empty
I feel very empty. This probably should be considered a sign of improvement. Though I wasn't able to leave home today, I still managed to spend my time busily employed. I transferred files from my old computer to the new one. I took house pictures to send to a friend, and I even got some writing done between rounds of Word Twister and Spider Solitaire, my two new game addictions. It is correct to assume that feeling empty means that I am not particularly happy, nor particularly fulfilled, nor particularly balanced. However, it does mean that feelings like anguish, sorrow, and loneliness did not take control of me either. Old hurts seem to be estabilized, not improved yet. Being empty gives me hope to find room inside myself for new emotions. Being empty buys me some time to accomodate many layers of a landslide and create barriers to avoid more damage. Being empty gives my mind time for a well deserved nap.
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